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During the early years, children may develop very specific ideas about what they will and will not wear. Naturally, those strong preferences may not always agree with what adults want them to wear. These times can be opportunities to work together on the notion of choice. “Do you want to wear the blue pants or the green pants?” And that swimsuit would be a no!

There are times when children must wear certain clothes, like when it's cold,

but you may be able to let them choose, say between a coat or a sweater, or between their white or brown shoes. Making even small decisions can give children a sense that they can be in control of some things. That way, they may not struggle so much about things they cannot control.

A fun way to give children many choices is to encourage dress up play. Sometimes people talk about ‘play’ as if it were a relief from times of serious learning. But play is serious learning. Play is a child's natural way to learn about themselves, other people and the world.

For many children, playing dress up is a favorite kind of pretending. When children try on and play with adult-sized clothes, hats, makeup, and props, they have an opportunity to learn more about the grownups in their lives. Dress up play about kings or clowns, fairies or firefighters can encourage children to take on roles that help them express their feelings in a positive way. In addition, while they're playing dress up, children often interact a lot and engage each other in rich conversations. So this kind of play helps children develop language skills.

Dressing up in different clothes can quickly encourage creative play although some children may find it more fun to pretend with puppets or small toys. Just as we find our own ways of expressing our adult selves, hopefully children will find theirs. That's why they need a variety of playthings to stimulate whatever creative play they may choose. With open-ended materials, like dress up clothes, blocks, musical instruments, and props, children can turn items into whatever they need!

No matter how children choose to express themselves in their play, they can begin to know, as we do, the pleasure of creating something that comes from their own ideas, thoughts and feelings -- something that's truly unique. When you let them know their play has value, you're letting them know you believe they have value, too.

Certain times of year we begin to see many costumes and disguises in stores

and even out walking around! This can be unsettling for young children. Help children see that changing your appearance on the outside doesn't change who you really are.

Disguise yourself in front of the children. First, put on a scarf to cover your hair. Explain that it is still you under the scarf. Then add a hat and sunglasses. Tell the children what you are doing at each step to remind them that you are still the same person.

Take off the disguise and let the children try on a variety of scarves, hats, and sunglasses. Encourage the children to look at themselves in a mirror as they dress up. Remind the children that even though they look different, they are still the same under the disguise.